I know it seems like forever since I've really posted anything, besides parts to my book and such of course. More meaningful things, ya know? Like me ranting about the topic of the day. I've come to find in going over my older posts how much life has changed in just a short amount of time. One minute you have life all mapped out then they somehow get changed. I always found it somewhat humorous how people make plans for the future, like they can actually plan life's little twists and turns. I know I've come to the realization that nothing can be put in stone, life will always be ever changing.
I think more then anything, I have come to realize, time has of course aged me. Obviously not in looks, I think I'll be 80 and still like 16 ...hehe...Just kidding. What I mean, in the sense of wants and hopes and in thoughts as well. Not by any means I'm "all grow'd up" ( =P ) or anything. Just that I find the things I use to enjoy, have simply become, non-important I guess you could say. Like reading and writing for instance. I think I figured out why I lost my ability to really write anymore.
I found that I had so many pent up emotions and turmoil inside of my I was fighting against. I was fighting against life and family and even myself. So with all those pent up emotions I was only able to release them through poetry. When I say time has aged me, I guess what I mean is that. I've worked through all those emotions, I've given up fighting against the tide and I ended up finding peace. Unfortunately, with that peace...I can't find it in me to write a good poem. So to those of you who might have hoped I'd start writing again, I'm sorry...Perhaps Yah will grant me with it again in the near future, but with the peace too.
In most aspects I am still the same ol' me that will always be, in other ways though, I have changed. I came to also realize, as we get older, our hopes and aspirations in life are bound to change. Who knows what we'll want in 5 years time? Who knows what Yah will have us doing then, eh? I pray though, that as life keeps changes us, we can keep the joy in our lives. To hold onto the things that make us smile and laugh.
I hope I didn't bore you all too much with my changing speech.
Pray you are all well and Blessed, Shalom!
